A people without the knowledge of their past history, origin and culture is like a tree without roots – Marcus Garvey
I’ve been thinking a lot about my move to the lowlands of late. The whole big step I’m taking isn’t something I have come to term with. Well, just not yet. I may come to term with it some day, one day. But till date, I’m still struggling with the emotional baggage i find it so heavy to carry. It’s like the worst baggage ever!
The emotional roller-coaster strike me every other week. One week, I would feel like I can’t wait to live in the Netherlands. Another week, I would procrastinate to do anything in regards to the move. Today, I can’t wait to be at the other side with the one I love, because I’m down with a flu and am all alone.
Oh yes, the feeling sucks. Big time!
I know how things can make one person change their view and thoughts about many things. However, I’ve find it so important to also never forget your roots. That is to never forget where you came from, your adopted cultures, origin etc. It would be a total disgrace if I really did forget the beauty of where I originated from. This sets me thinking when I feel somewhat such things is happening around me of late.
When I came back from my 5 weeks holiday in Europe. I remember I went to the grocery store and felt really frustrated by the crowd, I felt I had claustrophobic, I just had to escape from that situation. In the end, I came out of the store without buying what I really wanted to. I’d lose my focus. All I wanted was to get out. It’s a very strange feeling. I’ve never felt this way before.
I realize, I’m so used to living with space that being in Singapore becomes too crowded for me. Not good at all. I feel ashamed of myself, because I’ve lived such life many many times more than that 5 weeks in Europe plus those many times I was in Holland. So yes, I slap myself for feeling that way.
Just recently, I’ve come across someone who is in the same situation as I am. She travels from Singapore to the UK for the one she loves. At one time, she was living in the UK for an extended period of 4 months. When she comes back after the 4 month stay. She complains about the transportation system of Singapore, She complains about the old man coughing in the bus sitting right besides her. She complains of the weather in Singapore. She even forgets how the transportation in Singapore works, losing her ways! I’m not one that takes the public transport because I drive a car so I’m spared the crowd on public transport and the many public virus.
I wondered, are there no public transport in the UK? Are there no sick old man in some public transport at some point of time? Anywhere? Isn’t Singapore meant to be a tropical country that many love? Do we still love our home based? Lastly, isn’t this where you grow up for the past 20-30 or more years? Why wasn’t there any complain before? Why now?
Singapore isn’t the best place to live in, the tax systems, the education systems and many more but so are the other part of the world. There will always be something for us to complain. No where is the best, we just make the best out of it. But what is most important is we live with it, we work it out.
I decide I should write this post to remind myself I should never forget my roots. I may have to live in the Netherlands but never will I forget where I come from, how wonderful and safe my hometown is and most importantly my family, friends and the country! From Dust we come, to dust we will remain. 🙂